The freedom of fewer options.
Welcome to issue #033 of Unsubscribe. Each week, I send two essays that help you step off the default path to build a life you love, supported by work you enjoy. If you need support on your entrepreneurial journey, join our network of over 1,000 entrepreneurs. You’ll instantly join our group chat, weekly live Q&As, monthly workshops, and private in-person events.
We're addicted to having choices.
For some reason, we’ve decided that having more features, products, tools, and choices is a good thing. It isn’t.
Having too many options doesn't make us happier. It makes us miserable.
My wife and I are in the market for a new car. We went to five different dealerships, had seven conversations with salespeople who showed us 17 different models. Every car had slightly different specs and price tags. By the end, we felt completely exhausted, not excited. We were mentally drained from weighing all of the different options we had for a machine that gets us from here to there.
This happens constantly in our lives.
Open Netflix, and you'll spend 20 minutes scrolling through endless shows before giving up. Check your email and find 14 different newsletters waiting for your attention (sorry about that). Try to pick a restaurant and get lost down a rabbit hole of Google reviews.
Every option that you have to think through requires a lot of mental energy. Choices demand that you make a difficult decision.
If you think about the most stressed people you know, you might find that they're swimming in choices. Which city should they live in? Which business opportunity should they chase? Which strategy should they implement? They have so many damn choices, they end up doing nothing.
Now think about the calmest people you know. I’ll guarantee they have simpler lives. They say no more often than they say yes. They have clear boundaries. When they’re looking at cars or houses or opportunities, they’re limited. Sometimes they’re limited by where they work or their budget, or their kids, or whatever. Turns out, this is actually a good thing for most people.
When I simplified my business, I felt way less stressed and made more money. I started becoming a lot better at a few things, rather than being average at a lot. I built systems to make those things easier. I stopped wasting my limited and important energy on small decisions that didn't matter.
The same principle works extremely well in my personal life. When I emptied my closet and kept only the clothes I actually wore, getting dressed every morning became simple. Eventually, I reduced my "house outfit" to mostly a black sweatshirt and jeans. When I finally deleted social apps from my phone, I stopped feeling the urge to glance at it, where I'd inevitably be pulled in twenty different miserable directions.
Fewer options mean more mental breathing room for me.
It means I'm trading the anxiety of a zillion possibilities for the peace of just a few.
So, if you're someone who is always feeling overwhelmed, my best advice would be to remove options, not to add them.
Delete apps. Clear your schedule. Turn down opportunities. Say no to good things to make room for great things.
You're not limiting yourself. You're creating more space.
Space to find what you're actually looking for.
The freedom to focus on stuff that matters.
What’s your take on today’s topic? Do you agree, disagree, or is there something I missed?
If you enjoyed this read, the best compliment I could receive would be if you shared it.
Join our private network of 1,000+ entrepreneurs who have access to the following upcoming events and previous workshops from 6 and 7-figure entrepreneurs, CEOs, multiple New York Times Bestselling Authors, creators, makers, and more. You’ll also gain access to live weekly Q&As and invitations to members-only networking events worldwide.
The Paradox of Choice by Barry Schwartz was a game changing book for me.
I’ve noticed this when it comes to careers. When I was younger, I pursued a career as a concert violinist with intensity. It’s a tough career to make a living at, and although I succeeded to a degree (played for a smaller regional orchestra) I didn’t make it to the big orchestras I dreamed of.
Ever since then, the choice of “what should I do for a career” has plagued me…too many choices and options. It’s exhausting. At some level one just has to pick and stick.