I spend a lot of time looking backward. I reminisce about better days. When I felt things were simpler. When I was younger. When my career and life were a blank canvas in front of me...
Thank you for this reflection. When my girls were 5, 3, and 1, they orbited around my sun. Now, at 25, 23, 22, they’re off with their own things to do. Do I long for the good old days, or live for the grandmother stage? Or, just maybe, today is the greatest age. Thank you for the Monday muse & chat page. 💌
I'm in the thick of it right now with three children (two girls and one boy ages 14, 11, and 9, respectively.) So this post from you truly resonates! Thanks so much for sharing, Amanda! I truly want to embrace these moments -- albeit extremely chaotic and trying at times -- because I know they'll stick with me for the rest of my life. And at the end of the day, time with our children is always "pouring out". What really matters are the investments that we "pour in" to our children. I truly want to be more intentional about that moving forward.
It is hard. Parenting is not efficient. It isn’t meant to be. A lot of those days, everyone expects something of you, and no one is taking care of you, so it is natural to tune out. IT is hard to feel like you’re giving 100% to work and family ever. Cheers- 💌
I always think of this quote when talking about the good old days:
“Remember the days when you prayed for what you have now.”
We as humans easily forget. We always strive for more. Our goalposts keep moving.
Seeing the thought of your 80 year old neighbor opens my mind to the reality that even when you’re at the end of your life, you keep looking back for better days.
We have all been told that life goes by fast, but somehow no one seems to believe this will apply to them...until we look back and wonder where did the time go?
This reminds me of an old story with the punch line: "It's not how good the good times are, but how bad the bad times are that make the difference."
We all want the good times because they are enjoyable and easy.
But it is the bad times that build the character and require us to develop patience, resilience, and will motivate us to try new things when what we had been doing in our comfort zone no longer brings the same results.
It is human nature to want life to deal us a hand of cards of success and happiness but hard times come for everyone sooner or later, it is inevitable we will need to face them and success comes from overcoming the obstacle and looking back at the struggle.
What an insightful response, David. I sure know that life is flying by over here...I feel like just yesterday I was 21. Blinked and I'm almost 44. But, luckily, there have been far more good times than bad, and I feel fortunate about that.
Life appears to go by fast because we are always in a hurry. For us everything is urgent and important. The day we learn to slowdown will be the day we will regain the old sweet momentum of life.
Your message made me think of a quote I saw the other day - not sure the source - it went something like this...
"The single greatest skill you can develop is the ability to be in a great mood in the absence of things to be in a great mood about. If you can be in a bad mood for no reason, you might as well be in a good mood for no reason"
Our outlook on life is a choice we make every day, regardless of our circumstances.
An exercise this reminds me of that I need to do again- maybe I’ll do it now if I can get out of my own way.
Write down:
1. 3 things you’re grateful for
2. The hardest challenge in your life right now
3. What’s great about this?
Writing three things you’re grateful for gets the appreciation engine started. Then examine your biggest hardship.
Then ask what’s great about this challenge- what’s good about it? What benefits may come from this?
I’ve found the results pretty immediate and profound. Proves you can be grateful no matter what difficulties you’re having now, regardless of how bad the storm is.
You may be reminded of other hard times you’ve been through- and the positives that came from them.
Appreciation grows the more you use it. Writing this for me as a reminder.
Beautiful! I've always made it a point to ask my children to begin and end their day by taking a hefty dose of "Vitamin G", which is gratitude. It's so easy to find "the bad"; why not choose to find "the good" and express gratitude and thanks for that? It truly shapes a better attitude and mindset for the day ahead and the day that just transpired.
Lordy this was the messaging I needed to hear today. In the throes of high school graduation for my only son, the weekend has been spent deep in old videos and photos, sobbing/crying/weeping, longing for the old cuddles and regretting how much time I spent working and wishing he would stop needing me.
Thank you for this extremely timely reminder that truly all we have is right now. And to be kinder to myself in it.
That’s gas. I was only thinking about the very same thing this weekend. I watched my teen heading out wearing a jacket I had given her and she looked absolutely gorgeous in it, full of sass and personality. Funny thing I never felt like that wearing it. Never gave myself the permission. It really struck me how we often miss the good moments in life when we’re too busy criticising ourselves or waiting for something to be different. Would it be a great thing to learn early in life to appreciate the now.
My mom is just like this. She constantly worries about the future and mourns the past. She's rarely in the moment.
Growing up around that kind of melancholy, I think I subconsciously started searching for a different way to experience life - something more grounded in the present.
That’s what my morning gratitude practice does for me. It’s a simple daily reminder to pay attention to the here and now.
Maybe that’s part of what I love about racing, too - it demands pure presence. You can’t be anywhere else.
Looking back on my life at 54, I can honestly say I have zero regrets.
Sorry to hear about your back, Justin. I’ve been a personal trainer for 26 years and have worked with a lot of people managing chronic pain. If you ever want to talk, I’m happy to help however I can.
Felt this one. Funny thing, the other day a friend - an ex-colleague - and I were reminiscing about a job 12 years ago and how it had the best culture, the best team, and how everything was just right. The truth is 12 years ago we hated that job and left. Lol. The mind plays tricks. Enjoy the moment before it becomes the past that you loved.
I love this reminder, Justin. Feels like a meditation on the fact that all we ever really have is the present moment. I'm grateful for my health, my relationship, my apartment in BK, and having my family nearby.
As I turn 63 soon I have never felt more alive and motivated to create new experiences and to live in the moment. You realize the life train keeps moving with or without you… my wife and I love the new experiences and stories we are creating. I created a list of things I used to say “I wish one day blah blah” and converting them in to “guess what I just did”… life is way more fun!!
Living in the past and worrying about the future is easy. We have a tendency to overestimate the worth of what we have bought and underestimate the worth of what we have earned. This is the reason behind our inflated egos and diminishing self worth. We need to sitback, zoom out and accept that what we already have is still a dream for many. We spend maximum part of our life in the journey of becoming. If we miss to be happy in the journey itself then we are running a risk of associating our happiness on a few and short lived moments of achievement. No matter what you want to achieve in life if you do feel sufficient without it you will not feel sufficient after having it.
Just the other day I was reflecting on the burnout I went through back in 2009. I had just left a job that had me traveling 8-10 months a year, selling what I came to see as overpriced ad space in major U.S. print media to emerging markets execs. I felt ethically conflicted, and wrote a scathing blog post about it.
That post got picked up by a major financial blogger at Reuters and made the rounds. At the time, I felt self-righteous. But now, it reads more like a burst of burnout-fueled frustration, kind of immature, even ungrateful.
Looking back, that job gave me incredible experiences. I lived in 15+ countries, met CEOs, ministers, people I’d never have encountered otherwise. You’re absolutely right, it's easy to appreciate things in hindsight. The real challenge is learning to recognize the good while you’re still living it.
The good old days are right now, I may be an outlier, I live more in today and tomorrow than yesterday because I don't see "good old days" in the past, I'm seeking my best days ever now or tomorrow. Thanks for your inspiration and relevance always Justin.
Whew this one resonated with me. I find myself doing the same. When I was 29, my fiancee at the time (now my wife) and I left our jobs in TV News to chase our dream of living in NYC.
It was 2009 and the economy was in the toilet. I had to (almost literally) knock on doors to find a public relations shop to hire me. When I finally got work, it was a rude indoctrination to the corporate grind and culture.
Wracking up Delta SkyMiles
Working events on weekends
Getting caught up it the corporate urgency
But you know what?
I look back on that time now and think about how my wife and I would come home and trade corporate "war" stories about "circling back" and "touching base" and all the weird tales of working in an office.
We went out and enjoyed the City. Met up for drinks. Tried new cuisines and boozy brunches. We had a lot of fun actually.
Now we've got two young kids. And life is different. Not better or worse. But a new normal. New experiences and joys and things that light me up.
I oftentimes catch myself pining for the future when "I can slow down." This reflection is another subtle reminder that I can choose to slow down and be present. And enjoy what I have here.
Thank you for this reflection. When my girls were 5, 3, and 1, they orbited around my sun. Now, at 25, 23, 22, they’re off with their own things to do. Do I long for the good old days, or live for the grandmother stage? Or, just maybe, today is the greatest age. Thank you for the Monday muse & chat page. 💌
You're welcome. Thanks for sharing your experience, Amanda!
I'm in the thick of it right now with three children (two girls and one boy ages 14, 11, and 9, respectively.) So this post from you truly resonates! Thanks so much for sharing, Amanda! I truly want to embrace these moments -- albeit extremely chaotic and trying at times -- because I know they'll stick with me for the rest of my life. And at the end of the day, time with our children is always "pouring out". What really matters are the investments that we "pour in" to our children. I truly want to be more intentional about that moving forward.
Thanks again for sharing, Amanda!
It is hard. Parenting is not efficient. It isn’t meant to be. A lot of those days, everyone expects something of you, and no one is taking care of you, so it is natural to tune out. IT is hard to feel like you’re giving 100% to work and family ever. Cheers- 💌
I always think of this quote when talking about the good old days:
“Remember the days when you prayed for what you have now.”
We as humans easily forget. We always strive for more. Our goalposts keep moving.
Seeing the thought of your 80 year old neighbor opens my mind to the reality that even when you’re at the end of your life, you keep looking back for better days.
It’s true. He’s a wise old owl too. Really struck me when he said it.
We have all been told that life goes by fast, but somehow no one seems to believe this will apply to them...until we look back and wonder where did the time go?
This reminds me of an old story with the punch line: "It's not how good the good times are, but how bad the bad times are that make the difference."
We all want the good times because they are enjoyable and easy.
But it is the bad times that build the character and require us to develop patience, resilience, and will motivate us to try new things when what we had been doing in our comfort zone no longer brings the same results.
It is human nature to want life to deal us a hand of cards of success and happiness but hard times come for everyone sooner or later, it is inevitable we will need to face them and success comes from overcoming the obstacle and looking back at the struggle.
What an insightful response, David. I sure know that life is flying by over here...I feel like just yesterday I was 21. Blinked and I'm almost 44. But, luckily, there have been far more good times than bad, and I feel fortunate about that.
Life appears to go by fast because we are always in a hurry. For us everything is urgent and important. The day we learn to slowdown will be the day we will regain the old sweet momentum of life.
Your message made me think of a quote I saw the other day - not sure the source - it went something like this...
"The single greatest skill you can develop is the ability to be in a great mood in the absence of things to be in a great mood about. If you can be in a bad mood for no reason, you might as well be in a good mood for no reason"
Our outlook on life is a choice we make every day, regardless of our circumstances.
Love that, David. Thanks for sharing.
An exercise this reminds me of that I need to do again- maybe I’ll do it now if I can get out of my own way.
Write down:
1. 3 things you’re grateful for
2. The hardest challenge in your life right now
3. What’s great about this?
Writing three things you’re grateful for gets the appreciation engine started. Then examine your biggest hardship.
Then ask what’s great about this challenge- what’s good about it? What benefits may come from this?
I’ve found the results pretty immediate and profound. Proves you can be grateful no matter what difficulties you’re having now, regardless of how bad the storm is.
You may be reminded of other hard times you’ve been through- and the positives that came from them.
Appreciation grows the more you use it. Writing this for me as a reminder.
This is an awesome exercise, Christopher. I think I’ll give this a shot today.
Beautiful! I've always made it a point to ask my children to begin and end their day by taking a hefty dose of "Vitamin G", which is gratitude. It's so easy to find "the bad"; why not choose to find "the good" and express gratitude and thanks for that? It truly shapes a better attitude and mindset for the day ahead and the day that just transpired.
Lordy this was the messaging I needed to hear today. In the throes of high school graduation for my only son, the weekend has been spent deep in old videos and photos, sobbing/crying/weeping, longing for the old cuddles and regretting how much time I spent working and wishing he would stop needing me.
Thank you for this extremely timely reminder that truly all we have is right now. And to be kinder to myself in it.
What a wonderful comment, Jen. So glad it resonated with you. Appreciate you reading it.
That’s gas. I was only thinking about the very same thing this weekend. I watched my teen heading out wearing a jacket I had given her and she looked absolutely gorgeous in it, full of sass and personality. Funny thing I never felt like that wearing it. Never gave myself the permission. It really struck me how we often miss the good moments in life when we’re too busy criticising ourselves or waiting for something to be different. Would it be a great thing to learn early in life to appreciate the now.
Such an important take, Catherine. My wife and I talk about this a lot. How we don’t give ourselves that permission.
My mom is just like this. She constantly worries about the future and mourns the past. She's rarely in the moment.
Growing up around that kind of melancholy, I think I subconsciously started searching for a different way to experience life - something more grounded in the present.
That’s what my morning gratitude practice does for me. It’s a simple daily reminder to pay attention to the here and now.
Maybe that’s part of what I love about racing, too - it demands pure presence. You can’t be anywhere else.
Looking back on my life at 54, I can honestly say I have zero regrets.
The only thing I miss are healthy knees.
Racing? That's so cool, Steven. I can imagine that requires constant focus on the present. I'm the same as you with knees, just with my back lol.
Sorry to hear about your back, Justin. I’ve been a personal trainer for 26 years and have worked with a lot of people managing chronic pain. If you ever want to talk, I’m happy to help however I can.
Felt this one. Funny thing, the other day a friend - an ex-colleague - and I were reminiscing about a job 12 years ago and how it had the best culture, the best team, and how everything was just right. The truth is 12 years ago we hated that job and left. Lol. The mind plays tricks. Enjoy the moment before it becomes the past that you loved.
Funny how that works huh?
I love this reminder, Justin. Feels like a meditation on the fact that all we ever really have is the present moment. I'm grateful for my health, my relationship, my apartment in BK, and having my family nearby.
Love that, Ben. Feeling grateful myself today.
As I turn 63 soon I have never felt more alive and motivated to create new experiences and to live in the moment. You realize the life train keeps moving with or without you… my wife and I love the new experiences and stories we are creating. I created a list of things I used to say “I wish one day blah blah” and converting them in to “guess what I just did”… life is way more fun!!
Living in the past and worrying about the future is easy. We have a tendency to overestimate the worth of what we have bought and underestimate the worth of what we have earned. This is the reason behind our inflated egos and diminishing self worth. We need to sitback, zoom out and accept that what we already have is still a dream for many. We spend maximum part of our life in the journey of becoming. If we miss to be happy in the journey itself then we are running a risk of associating our happiness on a few and short lived moments of achievement. No matter what you want to achieve in life if you do feel sufficient without it you will not feel sufficient after having it.
Just the other day I was reflecting on the burnout I went through back in 2009. I had just left a job that had me traveling 8-10 months a year, selling what I came to see as overpriced ad space in major U.S. print media to emerging markets execs. I felt ethically conflicted, and wrote a scathing blog post about it.
That post got picked up by a major financial blogger at Reuters and made the rounds. At the time, I felt self-righteous. But now, it reads more like a burst of burnout-fueled frustration, kind of immature, even ungrateful.
Looking back, that job gave me incredible experiences. I lived in 15+ countries, met CEOs, ministers, people I’d never have encountered otherwise. You’re absolutely right, it's easy to appreciate things in hindsight. The real challenge is learning to recognize the good while you’re still living it.
The good old days are right now, I may be an outlier, I live more in today and tomorrow than yesterday because I don't see "good old days" in the past, I'm seeking my best days ever now or tomorrow. Thanks for your inspiration and relevance always Justin.
The good old days are the golden past in the view of an uncertain future - it‘s up to us how to see the present time and what to do with it!
Whew this one resonated with me. I find myself doing the same. When I was 29, my fiancee at the time (now my wife) and I left our jobs in TV News to chase our dream of living in NYC.
It was 2009 and the economy was in the toilet. I had to (almost literally) knock on doors to find a public relations shop to hire me. When I finally got work, it was a rude indoctrination to the corporate grind and culture.
Wracking up Delta SkyMiles
Working events on weekends
Getting caught up it the corporate urgency
But you know what?
I look back on that time now and think about how my wife and I would come home and trade corporate "war" stories about "circling back" and "touching base" and all the weird tales of working in an office.
We went out and enjoyed the City. Met up for drinks. Tried new cuisines and boozy brunches. We had a lot of fun actually.
Now we've got two young kids. And life is different. Not better or worse. But a new normal. New experiences and joys and things that light me up.
I oftentimes catch myself pining for the future when "I can slow down." This reflection is another subtle reminder that I can choose to slow down and be present. And enjoy what I have here.