What you describe here is EXACTLY why I originally left social media completely sometime around 2012 and then, after returning with a more deliberate attitude, have continued to alternate between use/engagement and periods of distance/detachment. After my first few years of using Facebook and Twitter in the aughts, I noticed they had effectively colonized my mind. I found myself spontaneously framing and evaluating everyday events and interactions in terms of their potential post value. To put it emphatically: Eff that. My inner world is not real estate to be developed by tech companies.
This same thing happened to me. I was unconsciously doing things with the intention of making it "Instagrammable", or even doing things that I didn't necessarily enjoy but were 'trending' online. I deleted all social media apps from my phone in March of 2024 and have never looked back. It has been the most quiet, present, and freeing year since. F*ck that noise.
I quit social for three years in 2015, because I didn’t like who I’d become. By the time I went back, I could see the enshittification so clearly that I have always been able to maintain a healthy relationship with it.
I recently lost access to my Facebook account. When I told people about it, they were more upset about it than I was. I’m *thrilled* about it. Because I don’t have to clean out a decade of old Facebook groups now. I get a fresh start and blank page. All they see is the loss of “friends.” But they were never friends.
I did the same thing by leaving social media for seven years and I just returned about a year and a half ago and the jury is still out. I am having difficulties navigating people I know or interact with who are a walking, talking algorithm. It just feels fake. And I have been recommended to "succumb" to it to further what I do. I struggle with that concept on a nearly daily basis. That the Internet and social media are the only keys to my professional survival.
This is why I dropped many of the social platforms, stopped chasing the best hooks, got off the social media treadmill and just started to write. I no longer wanted to feel like a social media content robot. I will not be returning there.
I am no different, likely. The piece isn't meant to be judgmental, it's simply an observation. And most of the observations I make are written back to myself. I am not immune.
Beautiful article! Great content about not losing yourself while making content..
Got pulled in by the authenticity of the essay, especially after getting to meet you and Jennifer over dinner, and understanding how grounded you both are even with a massive following.
This is actually so scary. I'm totally not panicking. I've honestly changed too, but this week I'm getting my personality back. This post was just confirmation.
"The algorithm doesn't just show us content. It shapes us into content."
Oof. I've seen this happen to people and am hyper-conscious to avoid falling into this trap. Fortunately, I don't particularly enjoy posting videos and photos often. Mostly words.
Are you not concerned that he will read that ? How as a creator do you have the courage to share this story ? I mean genuinely. Is it « creatively written », aka not entirely true or assembled in a way to make us feel what you felt (different details however). How do you manage to share personal stuff like that ?
I change some of the details much like an episode of Law & Order, while keeping the story extremely aligned with exactly what happened. Different city, different time period, etc.
Amazing, thank you Justin for sharing. And are you not concerned if someone, one day, realise you’re talking about them ? Like if a confrontation happens. Or is that the price you’re willing to pay for being fully creative, fully you, and express your thoughts ?
Might’ve been brutal to watch... almost like a Black Mirror episode! I think stories like this are important. They help us pause and reflect on whether we, too, are hypnotized by the algorithm. Thanks for sharing.
Your friend no longer feels. Imagine how that's stunting his personal and soulful growth. And now we have generations moving through society, unfeeling and unwise. Sounds like a zombie movie to me!
This is so important. It’s an interesting challenge as an entrepreneur to feel it’s “necessary” to leverage the power of social media for growth, but also a requirement of life to not be consumed by it. One experiment I’m trying is to focus on long form (Substack, real writing, real podcast conversions), and outsource short form to a social media manager. This “expert” is one step removed from being personally invested and it creates the breathing room for them to creatively identify and share hook-y content that connects to more real insights (that were the foundation from the get go). Plus I deleted all the social apps from my phone - I’m letting work be work confined to my laptop. Let’s see if this works… still in the early phases.
Unfortunately, I have a friend like this. He would often invite us to go to new and trending places because "his followers will like it". How about what WE like? That stopped being a consideration.
I must say, this really makes me wonder… do we even know who we’re becoming anymore when every moment gets filtered through a potential post?
It’s honestly a bit heartbreaking to see how authenticity can get chipped away by performance. I’ve seen this in LinkedIn land too - people start off sharing valuable insights and end up chasing engagement like it’s oxygen.
According to a study by Frontiers in Psychology, excessive social media use is linked to reduced authenticity and self-concept clarity.
(This is something I advise people to do in my training sessions:
– Set boundaries around online time with an app like One Sec to add a pause before posting
– Schedule “offline thinking” time every day to let real ideas breathe before turning them into content
– Ask yourself weekly: am I still sharing what I care about, or just what performs?)
What helps you stay grounded and keep your content true to you?
What you describe here is EXACTLY why I originally left social media completely sometime around 2012 and then, after returning with a more deliberate attitude, have continued to alternate between use/engagement and periods of distance/detachment. After my first few years of using Facebook and Twitter in the aughts, I noticed they had effectively colonized my mind. I found myself spontaneously framing and evaluating everyday events and interactions in terms of their potential post value. To put it emphatically: Eff that. My inner world is not real estate to be developed by tech companies.
Wow. I think a lot of folks go through this without ever becoming aware of it. Glad you did.
This same thing happened to me. I was unconsciously doing things with the intention of making it "Instagrammable", or even doing things that I didn't necessarily enjoy but were 'trending' online. I deleted all social media apps from my phone in March of 2024 and have never looked back. It has been the most quiet, present, and freeing year since. F*ck that noise.
I quit social for three years in 2015, because I didn’t like who I’d become. By the time I went back, I could see the enshittification so clearly that I have always been able to maintain a healthy relationship with it.
I recently lost access to my Facebook account. When I told people about it, they were more upset about it than I was. I’m *thrilled* about it. Because I don’t have to clean out a decade of old Facebook groups now. I get a fresh start and blank page. All they see is the loss of “friends.” But they were never friends.
I did the same thing by leaving social media for seven years and I just returned about a year and a half ago and the jury is still out. I am having difficulties navigating people I know or interact with who are a walking, talking algorithm. It just feels fake. And I have been recommended to "succumb" to it to further what I do. I struggle with that concept on a nearly daily basis. That the Internet and social media are the only keys to my professional survival.
This is why I dropped many of the social platforms, stopped chasing the best hooks, got off the social media treadmill and just started to write. I no longer wanted to feel like a social media content robot. I will not be returning there.
I’m curious to know how you are different from your friend though.
Because you sat there, watched him, judged him and also came up with content based on your perception of his behavior.
I am no different, likely. The piece isn't meant to be judgmental, it's simply an observation. And most of the observations I make are written back to myself. I am not immune.
This would be the start of a good novel
It would be. A bit scary, but oh so real...
keep going with the story, give us chapter 2 next week - i honestly think it would be pretty fun
Beautiful article! Great content about not losing yourself while making content..
Got pulled in by the authenticity of the essay, especially after getting to meet you and Jennifer over dinner, and understanding how grounded you both are even with a massive following.
Your Title Ate My Brain!
Now I finally understand what people love about your writing and storytelling.
Super impressed,
how it got me to stop, ponder, and digest,
the importance of leveraging
the algorithm
without being eaten.
Thank you, Jeff. That's really kind of you to write. I appreciate it.
This is actually so scary. I'm totally not panicking. I've honestly changed too, but this week I'm getting my personality back. This post was just confirmation.
"The algorithm doesn't just show us content. It shapes us into content."
Oof. I've seen this happen to people and am hyper-conscious to avoid falling into this trap. Fortunately, I don't particularly enjoy posting videos and photos often. Mostly words.
Are you not concerned that he will read that ? How as a creator do you have the courage to share this story ? I mean genuinely. Is it « creatively written », aka not entirely true or assembled in a way to make us feel what you felt (different details however). How do you manage to share personal stuff like that ?
I change some of the details much like an episode of Law & Order, while keeping the story extremely aligned with exactly what happened. Different city, different time period, etc.
Amazing, thank you Justin for sharing. And are you not concerned if someone, one day, realise you’re talking about them ? Like if a confrontation happens. Or is that the price you’re willing to pay for being fully creative, fully you, and express your thoughts ?
Great share. The part about replacing book reading with a ChatGPT summary felt particularly poignant.
Right?
Might’ve been brutal to watch... almost like a Black Mirror episode! I think stories like this are important. They help us pause and reflect on whether we, too, are hypnotized by the algorithm. Thanks for sharing.
Thanks for reading it.
Make sure your buddy gets a copy of this!
We actually talked about it. And he's a thick-skinned enough person to take the feedback. I would expect nothing less from him to me.
Even better. We all benefit from friends who will say it like it is.
Your friend no longer feels. Imagine how that's stunting his personal and soulful growth. And now we have generations moving through society, unfeeling and unwise. Sounds like a zombie movie to me!
It sure does.
I got scared reading this. How insane
Haha. Sorry about that.
This is so important. It’s an interesting challenge as an entrepreneur to feel it’s “necessary” to leverage the power of social media for growth, but also a requirement of life to not be consumed by it. One experiment I’m trying is to focus on long form (Substack, real writing, real podcast conversions), and outsource short form to a social media manager. This “expert” is one step removed from being personally invested and it creates the breathing room for them to creatively identify and share hook-y content that connects to more real insights (that were the foundation from the get go). Plus I deleted all the social apps from my phone - I’m letting work be work confined to my laptop. Let’s see if this works… still in the early phases.
Unfortunately, I have a friend like this. He would often invite us to go to new and trending places because "his followers will like it". How about what WE like? That stopped being a consideration.
I must say, this really makes me wonder… do we even know who we’re becoming anymore when every moment gets filtered through a potential post?
It’s honestly a bit heartbreaking to see how authenticity can get chipped away by performance. I’ve seen this in LinkedIn land too - people start off sharing valuable insights and end up chasing engagement like it’s oxygen.
According to a study by Frontiers in Psychology, excessive social media use is linked to reduced authenticity and self-concept clarity.
(This is something I advise people to do in my training sessions:
– Set boundaries around online time with an app like One Sec to add a pause before posting
– Schedule “offline thinking” time every day to let real ideas breathe before turning them into content
– Ask yourself weekly: am I still sharing what I care about, or just what performs?)
What helps you stay grounded and keep your content true to you?