Absolutely relevant across well, everything. It's good to have a gentle reminder that life does happen in the margins and when you're too optimised you may miss out on something more magical. It's a fine balance between the two.
Maximization is another form of comparisonitis. Because we see others "maximizing" and getting results, our brain borrows that narrative and tries to implement. Usually, with the opposite result.
Another thing that just came to mind is catching myself using the word ”should” in relation to an activity or action or task is a good indicator that it is not aligned.
Agreed that spontaneity and unplanned experiences have created the best memories for me. Going with the flow. Being in flow is where the juice is for me.
Some of our favorite family experiences have been simply going to our local county park, going for a walk along the path they have by the river, and it's amazing how rejuvenated we all feel after. That's the best "maximized" agenda. :)
Thanks for sharing, Justin. Great read as always. I imagine this was incredibly hard to unlearn. After reading it, I paused and realized I do the same... in a few areas of my life, not completely. And it becomes automatic after a while, doesn’t it? Takes real strength to bring awareness to this pattern and actually change it. Bravo.
This is relatable and I’m sure all of us have been on the maximise road before or even still are!
After burning out to the point of illness several times (yep, I didn’t listen) I finally learned I needed to build my work around my “play,” not the other way round. That was one of the hardest shift to make when you’re so used to go, go, go.
If it was easy everyone would be doing it, lol! But I think when we are truly conscious of the change we want to make we work equally hard to protect our new want. When we slip, it’s ok because we’re only human, but the difference now is that we recognize the slip and keep trying to do better.
The whole quantified self thing is like everything else in life, ok in moderation. It’s useful to measure things and make actions time bound but it’s also ok to change plans on the fly. Sticking to something so rigid drives me nuts.
I had a rather interesting realization that it was a traumatic experience that led me to attempt to control outcomes excessively through micromanaging, or "maximizing" my life. I lost my brother over a decade ago and I thought I was grieving the loss of his presence in my life, but in reality, I was mourning the loss of the person I was before I received the news of his passing. It was only through fasting and surrendering that I listened to what my heart was truly asking me all along. I ask that question because sometimes things are a lot deeper than they appear and there is great insight in understanding ourselves more intimately. I thought maybe there was something deeper involved that you discovered along your journey.
Damn. That's terrible, Brent. I'm so sorry to hear that happened, but glad to hear that you found a way to work through it (although I'm sure not fully, and may never be). Thank you for sharing.
No need for an apology. We are all living on borrowed time.
But ultimately I was just saying that sometimes we compensate for things that are difficult to look at within ourselves with "maximizing or optimizing." When in reality, we are simply avoiding.
I was curious if you were maximizing from a place of lack or abundance?
@Justin Welsh I love reading your material because you’re real with people, and you’re also talking to yourself when you are giving solid advice to your fans. Thank you.
For peace of mind, resign as General Manager of the Universe … just enjoy the ride!
“The truth is that life exists in the margins and the unoptimized spaces.”
- the best summer I ever had was hanging out with friends with little to no plans at all. Well said.
Thanks, Remy! Most of my best moments have been completely spontaneous.
Absolutely relevant across well, everything. It's good to have a gentle reminder that life does happen in the margins and when you're too optimised you may miss out on something more magical. It's a fine balance between the two.
It really is. I’ve found life to be a lot more fun when I just let stuff happen…
Maximization is another form of comparisonitis. Because we see others "maximizing" and getting results, our brain borrows that narrative and tries to implement. Usually, with the opposite result.
Yep. I feel that in my bones 😂
Another thing that just came to mind is catching myself using the word ”should” in relation to an activity or action or task is a good indicator that it is not aligned.
Very true…
Agreed that spontaneity and unplanned experiences have created the best memories for me. Going with the flow. Being in flow is where the juice is for me.
Some of our favorite family experiences have been simply going to our local county park, going for a walk along the path they have by the river, and it's amazing how rejuvenated we all feel after. That's the best "maximized" agenda. :)
Same! Just walking and meeting up with friends randomly.
Thanks for sharing, Justin. Great read as always. I imagine this was incredibly hard to unlearn. After reading it, I paused and realized I do the same... in a few areas of my life, not completely. And it becomes automatic after a while, doesn’t it? Takes real strength to bring awareness to this pattern and actually change it. Bravo.
Thanks, Lucas. The truth is, I’m still unlearning it. It’s so hard.
Toxic maximization!
I agree...too much leads to burn out. Been there, done that.
less is always more.
This is relatable and I’m sure all of us have been on the maximise road before or even still are!
After burning out to the point of illness several times (yep, I didn’t listen) I finally learned I needed to build my work around my “play,” not the other way round. That was one of the hardest shift to make when you’re so used to go, go, go.
Absolutely one of the most difficult things I've done (and am still doing). I still fail at this probably every single day.
If it was easy everyone would be doing it, lol! But I think when we are truly conscious of the change we want to make we work equally hard to protect our new want. When we slip, it’s ok because we’re only human, but the difference now is that we recognize the slip and keep trying to do better.
The whole quantified self thing is like everything else in life, ok in moderation. It’s useful to measure things and make actions time bound but it’s also ok to change plans on the fly. Sticking to something so rigid drives me nuts.
Yep. It produced the opposite results then I thought it would...
If I’m up at 5am something’s gone horribly wrong. Or my daughter woke up early
So funny. I love getting up at 5 a.m. but that's only because I'm asleep by 8:30 p.m. But if I'm up past 10, something has gone horribly wrong for me.
I tried doing mornings. Just never worked. Can’t deny your default settings
What was it exactly that you were trying to achieve that led you to attempting to control outcomes in such a strict way?
Maximizing can come with a cost and once you start feeling you’re bending over that way it’s time for a check-in with yourself.
The idea of some sort of "maximized life" which isn't actually possible.
I had a rather interesting realization that it was a traumatic experience that led me to attempt to control outcomes excessively through micromanaging, or "maximizing" my life. I lost my brother over a decade ago and I thought I was grieving the loss of his presence in my life, but in reality, I was mourning the loss of the person I was before I received the news of his passing. It was only through fasting and surrendering that I listened to what my heart was truly asking me all along. I ask that question because sometimes things are a lot deeper than they appear and there is great insight in understanding ourselves more intimately. I thought maybe there was something deeper involved that you discovered along your journey.
Damn. That's terrible, Brent. I'm so sorry to hear that happened, but glad to hear that you found a way to work through it (although I'm sure not fully, and may never be). Thank you for sharing.
No need for an apology. We are all living on borrowed time.
But ultimately I was just saying that sometimes we compensate for things that are difficult to look at within ourselves with "maximizing or optimizing." When in reality, we are simply avoiding.
I was curious if you were maximizing from a place of lack or abundance?
Great points, as I sit here and look at my maximized Outlook calendar. F**k it. Some of this crap is coming off today. Thank you!
Welcome, Allen. Thanks for giving it a read. Appreciate your time.
@Justin Welsh I love reading your material because you’re real with people, and you’re also talking to yourself when you are giving solid advice to your fans. Thank you.